Paternity leave is for paternits.

So my boss is on paternity leave and while he does know I have a blog, I’m pretty darn sure he never reads it so I can safely say this:  I fucking hate paternity leave.

Why?  Why would I hate something as important as a father spending the first few moments with their baby in an effort to bond?  Am I dead inside?  Am I just evil?!?!

No.  The truth is, I don’t actually hate that men have a right to do this.  In fact, I absolutely love that it is an American right to take 2 weeks off to get your barrings back after holy fucking shit you have a squirmy little marshmallow that you poops and you have to figure out how to fix that!  I just hate that my boss got to take one.  And left while I was still on vacation.  And didn’t leave a note.  And never said goodbye.  And I came back to having 800 emails and no fucking clue what was going on.  And everyone around here decided to go crazy while he was gone when I have to be him.  And I have to be the bad guy.  And I’m already usually the bad guy but usually just say “Well talk to Mr Boss because it was his idea”  (even though that is simply never really the truth).  And got to have a baby.  AND I DON’T.

There I said it.  I’m jealous.  He has a kid.  I don’t.  Sue me.

O.  And I might be just a little grumpy today.  In case that went unnoticed.


3 Responses to “Paternity leave is for paternits.”

  1. 1 goldfish5 August 19, 2008 at 10:26 am

    I’m jealous too. Let’s hate him.

  2. 2 Your boss August 25, 2008 at 9:33 pm

    That’s why you’re overpaid. Deal. ha ha ha

  3. 3 goldfish5 August 26, 2008 at 8:03 am

    dude, you are so busted.

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