They’re not hard, they’re soft

I just can’t stop laughing about it. It makes me giggle every time. Last night I got a fantastically drunkin phone call from what appeared to be roughly 3,150 infertile women in a small room with a lot of alcohol. It was loud, the tequila was flowing, and one after another the baby killing jokes were flying off the shelf like a 2fer sale. All that cycle babble felt strangely nice. Due to my neurotic guarded fertility status, words like IUI, IVF, Miscarriage, Clomid, or RE never leave my lips. In fact, even simple words like trigger, cycle, baby, infertility or sperm count are oddly forbidden from any sentence said out loud.   My blog is a great way for me to barf out all these words in one handy little package that I can refer to on my time. But hear them? In real life? Actual audible versions? No way jose. Who the heck would I even have this convo with?
It was surprisingly comfortable and nice. Even though none of these drunken ladies even remember our conversations, they still had a rather large impact on me. Not only did I really enjoy finally giving my muppets identifiable voices (MM yours is certifiably southern), I got to spend 30 minutes barfing out words that only live within the confounds of my uterus. Er…and my brain. I got off the phone and felt half terrified (because I was kinda a big awkward dork on the phone) and half elated to have expelled some of these topics onto a group of woman all going through the same thing. Support group? Wow, what a novel concept. I’m slow.

The best part of the entire phone call has to be awarded to K. I’ll have to accept this award on your behalf as you are unable to attend this ceremony due to your hangoverness…and you’re “on location”. K, who was feeling rather proud of her sober status last night, (A sober status that was only partially compromised by her multiple tequila shots 2, 3, 7…who’s counting right? Love you K) was filling me in on all the stuff I was missing out on. She told me “there are a lot of babies here. Lots of babies.” to which I inquired “aww is that hard?” (K just mc’ed a month ago)

At this point, K’s reply, pretty much rocked my world. K said – and I quote – “huh? Babies aren’t hard. They’re soft!!”

Good to know K. Good. To. Know.

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8 Responses to “They’re not hard, they’re soft”


  1. 1 singletracey March 10, 2008 at 7:27 am

    OK… I remember bits of our phone convo..tequila does that to me.. bits and pieces of conversations fade while bits and pieces of me fly outta my shirt!!! LORDIE! BUT.. I did remember to come over to your blog this am. I will catch up this week 🙂 Oh and I also remember that we are sorta kinda close so … you know.. we should work on meeting up for some sort of meal or coffee 🙂

  2. 2 b March 10, 2008 at 7:54 am

    HA HA HAHAHAHAH….She’s probably mortified that you just blogged this.you know that right? .i.. babybound!

  3. 3 milkmaid79 March 10, 2008 at 8:32 am

    Hehehe- that’s all I’m allowed to say by pinkie swears and blood oaths… hehehe!

  4. 4 The mother hen March 10, 2008 at 11:00 am

    apparently I missed this drunk dial seesion…well… because I was the only sober (non pregnant) adult in the house. So glad that you got to put voices with names, but trust me the faces are so much better. You really must make it next time!

  5. 5 b March 10, 2008 at 11:02 am

    HEY!!! I was sober..and definitely not pregnant!

  6. 6 mycowgirlalterego March 10, 2008 at 11:43 am

    Aww. I wish you’d been there so I could have taped you and put you on YouTube!

    J/k! You were so missed!!!!

  7. 7 meg March 10, 2008 at 1:35 pm

    I was sober! But, I missed the convo too 🙂 I think we had left by then… but I can only imagine the convo!


  1. 1 that’s all i’m saying « knuckle down Trackback on March 10, 2008 at 4:52 am

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