An old lady, 2 stop signs & a ritual…

Let me paint a little picture for you…

The scene: Driving to work. Very sunny, beautiful day. Me, tired, but for the most part jolly.

First stop sign at the end of the block: an old, heavy, black, possibly homeless (but I don’t personally know her so its unfair to say definitely), lady is standing at the corner. I stop my vehicle well behind the white line and pause. Old lady and I catch eyes for a brief second at which point I notice that old lady is glaring at me. Glaring? I’m not going anywhere. I’m waiting at the stop sign. I’m stopped. The opposite of driving is stopping…this is what I am doing. Yet old lady is glaring. The opposite of smiling is glaring. Glaring for stopping? I’m confused.

My most endearing morning smile quickly morphed into a “wha?” face. At this point, the old bat shakes her head in disgust at me. My “wha” grows larger and it is at this point (please don’t forget that I’m still very much stopped) that old bat pulls her hand out of her coat, lifts up what appears to be her index finger, and POINTS at me. Points? At the stopper? Who’s stopped at the stop sign? As she verrrrrry sloooooowly reaches the center of the street, she takes this little pointer and shakes it back and fourth, mumbles (ok shouts) some incoherent string of words in the direction of my very much stopped vehicle, then points her finger to the stop sign. Am I missing something here? Is she afraid I’m playing a little game of chicken with her because of a friendly gesture first thing in the morning? Should I never smile again? O if this was the only odd thing that happened today, but no…

The scene: 35th or 90th stop sign before I reach the freeway (gotta love the city). Stopped again.

A younger Spanish woman is standing on the corner in front of a very popular coffee shop. She seems to be performing some sort of morning coffee house ritual I am unaware of. It must be a San Francisco crazy person thing. I’ll do my best to describe it here for any of you that are interested in a new form of worship although I am not so sure I can comment on what it is you will be worshiping.

While spinning around counter clockwise, she waves a large, plastic Chinese type calendar. She spins exactly 3 times and then kisses the calendar. Lather, rinse, repeat at least 3 more times – if you start to fall over, continue to kiss the calendar until you stabilize. Reverse direction and continue 3 more times. Take exactly 5 steps slowly backwards (make sure to count as this seems to be a very integral part of the ceremony), turn to the right, pause. Put this plastic calendar back into the stack you are carrying and grab another one. Kiss new calendar, and repeat ritual. Note: anyone that might walk by or see you during any of these steps is to be greeted with a very loud – and quite possibly inaudible – good morning!!! Continue all steps as long as you wish. I am not sure I can provide a proper number as I’m not a very coffee/calendar religious person.

This is probably reason #35 that I love San Francisco. Anywhere else, my horribly long commute would be boring. San Francisco is gracious enough to provide entertainment along the way. They truly think of everything!!


4 Responses to “An old lady, 2 stop signs & a ritual…”

  1. 1 Hilary (The Trying Game) November 15, 2007 at 12:11 pm

    hahahahaha what a great morning! Can’t wait to hear about your drive home!

  2. 2 b November 15, 2007 at 1:21 pm

    your ride to work totally kicks my ride to works ass!

  3. 3 kittenroar5 November 15, 2007 at 5:32 pm

    Yes. I’d take that drive. I almost died on the way home from the over abundance of red pick up trucks. Gotta love Texas!

  4. 4 geohde November 15, 2007 at 9:41 pm

    Hope that you drive with the car doors locked 😉


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