AIM served

Anyone have one of those ex-coworkers that latches on to you and keeps in touch? Someone you don’t really have anything in common with and never really liked in the first place? Nothing really wrong with the person (other then their complete inability to carry on an appropriate conversation in the office), but you just don’t have an empty spot in your friend basket for them. Yeah? OK that person just pinged me this:

so how you guys doing up there in the bay area? you got any little ones yet?”

Way to brighten up my day I’ll tell ya. Its bad enough to get this nonsense from people that I like. This dude is just someone I remember ditching when we all went out for drinks after work. (we were young, immature, and didn’t like him so we would tell him the wrong bar. Every. Time.) Yet, every few months he pings me.

Go away rude idiot!! No I don’t have any “little ones”. Unless you are referring to little grey hairs. Yes I have several growing out of my chin did you want me to mail you a few? Or little leftover bruises on my ass. Yup, I still have a couple of those, but no I cannot send you pictures as that feels very snuff to me and I’m not into that sort of thing. (and must go shower 100 more times to remove all remnants of that visual)

O, I’m sorry. You didn’t mean those things? You meant little leftover needles right? I’m sure I could dig up a few in a drawer so the answer is yes. Still no? OOOOO You mean embryos in the deep freeze right? No I do not have any of those. O wait, I get it. You totally mean children. Ahhhhhh no we have none of those, but fuck you very much for asking.

How about a little more surface chatter and a little less TMI in the future, Mr. Nosey Pants. Next time you want to chat, I’ll be at a bar, down the street, called “Screw you”. No really. That’s what its called. I thought it was strange too.  You can Google it for directions…

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5 Responses to “AIM served”


  1. 1 Hilary (The Trying Game) November 13, 2007 at 1:02 pm

    Oh man, I am so sorry. I hate sh*t like that. I recently got an email from an aunt I barely ever speak to that said something like, “you know you’re next in line to have some babies, right?”

    I was like, OH REALLY? THANK YOU FOR THAT MUTHAF*CKING REMINDER!

  2. 2 geohde November 13, 2007 at 1:49 pm

    Some pepole are genetically incapable of taking a hint, OR buying a clue,

    J

  3. 3 meg November 13, 2007 at 2:42 pm

    Yuck I am sorry… I know those conversations all too well…. but you did have me laughing… I LOVE the way you explain things 🙂 You are a very funny girl!

    And yes… next time mail him a few items… maybe he will stop asking!

  4. 4 katarinajellybeana November 13, 2007 at 2:49 pm

    I suggest a well placed “None of your damned business, asshole.”

    People are ridiculous.

  5. 5 kittenroar5 November 13, 2007 at 6:07 pm

    Ugg. Why can’t we shoot these people legally?


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